Popular Misconceptions About Few Creatures

Many animals unfortunately suffer from a rather negative image in human culture, regarded by us as frightening, disgusting or just plain lowly. Nature, however, has no “vermin” or “pests” – all things have their place in the natural order of things, and in most cases, the benefits of an organism far outweigh its (accidental) inconveniences. Even animals many of us find “ugly” are only demonstrating the perfect body shape for their particular ecological niche. Open up your mind a little, and you just might find some beauty in something that once made your skin crawl.

10. Snakes

Millions of people the world over suffer from a fear of snakes, and even those who don’t may kill the limbless reptiles on sight, fearing for the safety of their pets or children. This is most unfortunate, as only around fifteen percent of known snakes possess venom at all, and dangerous species can be easy to distinguish with a little research. Wherever you may live, there are likely only a few distinct varieties worthy of extreme caution, and as the saying goes, they’re more afraid of us than we are of them. The last thing a snake wants to do is waste its precious venom on something it can’t even eat, so unless startled or cornered, snakes will nearly always attempt to flee and hide before actually striking. It’s still easy to vilify a slithering, unblinking serpent as it strangles and engulfs a pudgy little tweety bird, but even “cute” animals like songbirds are often lethal predators to still smaller creatures. It’s important to remember the role hunters play in saving the very species they prey upon from the starvation, disease and inbreeding that comes with an uncontrolled population.

9. Black Widows

We’ve always heard that the black widow is one of the deadliest spiders in the world, but while this is more or less true, it’s just not saying much. Completely unaggressive towards larger creatures, widow bites are quite rare, and lethal bites are even rarer – those at risk are normally only infants, the elderly or those suffering some pre-existing medical conditions. They’re still creepy though, right? With that whole “devouring the male” thing. Yeah, about that…of the 31 species of Latrodectus or “widow” spider, only two species have been observed eating their mates at all, neither of which are the famous red-hourglass black widow, and the cannibals in question were likely just frightened by their gigantic human voyeurs. Though the male is weak and snack-sized, the larger female normally allows him to escape or even hang around in her web a while, where her presence makes him a tad safer from an assortment of spider-eating things.

8. Termites

The only thing most people know about termites is that they eat wood, and we like to live in wood, so that’s bad. Many organisms can make a nuisance of themselves by colonizing a human dwelling, but only termites can outright destroy one from the inside, costing us billions of dollars in damages each year. As far as nature is concerned, however, dead wood is nothing more than a fire hazard standing in the way of fresh growth, and nothing in the wild mulches a dead tree as quickly and thoroughly as a termite colony. Working together with fungi, bacteria and an assortment of other wood eating insects, termites are integral in the continued health of every forest on the planet. It’s hardly their fault that we like to build houses out of perfectly good food…the little guys don’t even have eyes, cut them some slack.

7. Rats

It’s a classic image of horror: mangy, greasy rats crawling out of the decaying human corpse they’ve been gnawing at. Rats have had a reputation as filthy, dirty carrion-eaters ever since they were blamed for the dreaded bubonic plague, but while the disease is indeed carried primarily by the fleas of rodents, cases are rare today and many experts argue that it was not responsible for the infamous “black death“. Rats are also quite shy, highly unlikely to bite and can be very rewarding pets, demonstrating much more intelligence and affection than such dumber, nippier rodents as hamsters and guinea pigs. As for corpse-eating, scavenging decayed meat is actually rather low on a rat’s list of dietary preferences.

6. Wasps

Millions of people suffer from a fear of wasps, as some species seem needlessly aggressive and are well known for their painful, venomous stings. A majority of wasp species, however, are unable to actually sting us humans or even lack stings entirely, and venomous or not, they play a tremendously important role both as pollinators and in the control of other insect species, regulating their populations far better than almost any other predator. Many trees and plants are even capable of *communicating* with wasps, releasing chemical signals to attract just the right wasps for whatever pests might be munching their foliage. Incidentally though, those plant-eating insects are important themselves; as long as they’re kept in check by wasps and other predators, their natural pruning service can maintain a strong, healthy plant population. When wasps do attack us larger mammals, it’s often because our own fear makes us appear more aggressive, and social wasps will risk it all when they feel their defenseless young are threatened. Mind your own beeswax around buzzing bugs, and they probably will too. Only maybe more literally.

5. Sharks

One of nature’s most feared predators, sharks are generally portrayed by the media as ravenous, unfeeling jaws and teeth that happen to have animals attached to them. World-wide, however, the typical year sees under a dozen human deaths by shark attack, as opposed to thousands of deaths by drowning or other swimming accidents. Sharks are quite a bit more intelligent than most people give them credit for, and often avoid prey as unfamiliar as humans. Predation by sharks is of great importance to the health of fish populations, maintaining the balance necessary for many different species to thrive in the same environment, and they’re far from brainless eating machines – some species even demonstrate play behavior and sharks in captivity may be possible to “tame.”

4. Dolphins

What…you thought all of these were going to be *negative* misconceptions? Many of us unfortunately have it in our heads that while Sharks are mindless, ravenous eating machines, Dolphins are sweet, playful little sea-people, ready to protect us from those big, bad sharks and do fun tricks for our amusement. Dolphins, however, are predators themselves; lethally powerful, cunningly intelligent, fiercely territorial, pack hunting flesh-eaters. Animals live by very different rules, and while it isn’t fair to categorize them as “good” or “bad,” it’s hard to find dolphins very cute when they have been observed tormenting, killing and even sexually assaulting other animals for often unclear reasons, including young pups of their own species, and attacks on humans are by no means unheard of.
Maybe they’re only smiling so much at their own perverse fantasies.

3. Cockroaches

Ewww, cockroaches! Everyone hates cockroaches! They’re dirty, nasty, parasites who only exist to live in our garbage, right?! Can there possibly be anything good about them? Do I still have to answer that at this point? The order Blattodea has over 30,000 known species, yet only around a dozen or so have the special characteristics to thrive in our homes – characteristics which make them useful scavengers in the wild. Most roaches prefer a more conventional insect life outdoors, where they help to recycle decaying vegetation, pollinate plants, and in some cases even prey on more harmful insects. Even those few “pest” species aren’t as filthy as you think…in fact, they’re only ever as filthy as their surroundings, and they’re just as likely to live in perfectly sanitary conditions as in decaying garbage. House roaches only have the potential to spread disease primarily by walking through something germ-ridden (like an unkempt kitchen trash bin) and accidentally tracking it onto your food, which is actually rather unlikely; germs don’t cling to their bodies all that easily, and the little neat-freaks groom themselves almost constantly.  Yes, believe it or not, roaches practice better hygiene than a lot of humans.

2. Maggots

The very thought of fly larvae squirming around in a corpse is difficult for some people to stomach. It seems like they’re often regarded as one of the most nauseating, abhorrent organisms in nature, largely due to the whole “squirming around in corpses” thing, but the same reasons people detest them are the same reasons they shouldn’t. A dead body is a ticking time bomb of contagious diseases, and no other scavenger can even come close to the importance of maggots. Everything about these little critters – shape, size, squirminess, sliminess and even that ghostly pale coloration – is adapted for maximum efficiency carcass removal, scouring every nook and cranny of a skeleton for the tiniest scraps of soft tissue. Thanks to maggots, most carcasses only lie around in the wilderness for a few weeks before only bones remain, while other processes of decomposition would have them festering for months. Maggot activity is even somewhat antiseptic, destroying the bacteria they’re basically competing with for food. The bottom line is…would you rather every animal dropping dead every moment of every day nourish several hundred flies or several million Anthrax bacteria?

1. Parasites

“Parasites” is admittedly a pretty damn broad umbrella. You can find them within every phylum of every kingdom of life on our planet, they easily outnumber non-parasitic or “free living” lifeforms and almost nothing lives entirely free from their influence. The very word “parasite” is associated with uselessness, and even science was once guilty of the belief that parasites were “lower” on the evolutionary ladder. Today, however, biologists are waking up to the incredible sophistication and significant ecological impact of parasitic organisms. Nearly every wild animal on this planet has parasites feeding and breeding inside it as we speak, influencing the host’s health and even behavior to better suit their needs. It may sound disturbing, but as this has been going on since the dawn of life as we know it, it should have always been obvious that they’re as much a part of nature’s delicate balance as any other form of life, even regulating entire food webs and possibly influencing evolution itself. Most have adapted to cause as little harm to hosts as possible (why kill your own delicious, delicious house?) and even those that haven’t are still playing their part in population control. Parasites are just the eyeless, brainless little governors of ecoville, working hard on the inside to keep those cheetahs running on time.



Related Post: Dangers River Creatures

Interesting facts about SEX

Something About . . .

Sex

During 30 minutes of active sex, the average person burns approximately 200 calories. On average, adult men think about sex every seven seconds. Having sex at least once per week can lower a man’s risk of heart disease by 30%, stroke by 50%, and diabetes by 40%. It has also been shown that men with an active sex life are more likely to live past 80 years. The average size of an erect penis measures between 5 and 6 inches, while the average size of a flaccid penis is about 3.5 inches. The sperm count of the average American male in 2008 was down nearly 30% from the sperm count of an average American male 30 years ago. Viagra was released in 1998 with over $411 million in profits within its first three months Viagra, the well-known blue pill designed to help with erectile dysfunction, made $411 million in profits within the first three months of its release in 1998 before going on to make $1.8 billion in 2003. Use of the condom was first noted in published literature in the early 1500s. The device was originally made of linen, and historians believe the legendary lover Casanova used linen condoms. Historical records show that even in 1850 B.C., women attempted to practice birth control. The most common method was a mixture of crocodile dung and honey placed in the vagina in the hopes of preventing pregnancy. Although nearly any body part or item of clothing may be an object of sexual fetishism, the shoe and the foot are the two most common fetishes in Western society. Just a decade ago, only 25% of women reported experiencing orgasm as a result of intercourse. In recent years, this number has risen to about 45%. In contrast, over 80% of women report experiencing orgasm though oral sex. The vibrator, a common sex toy for women, was originally designed in the nineteenth century as a medication to combat the anxiety-related symptoms of “hysteria” (now known as menstruation). Homosexuality was listed as a mental illness with the American Psychiatric Association (APA) until 1973. It has since been removed and is now considered an orientation by the APA instead of an illness. Throughout the United States, approximately 4% of the population self-identifies as gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Approximately 1% of people worldwide identify as asexual (having no strong sexual attraction to either sex). One in five Americans has been sexually involved with a coworker Statistics suggest that approximately one in every five Americans has indulged in sex with a colleague at work. Approximately 70% of people in the U.S. admit to fantasizing about group sex at some point in their life, and more than 50% of those people actually follow through. Nearly one in four Americans (65 millions people) are currently living with an incurable sexually transmitted disease (STD). During 2007, more than 2.5 million people worldwide became infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS. With these new cases, there are now 33 million people living with AIDS throughout the world. Since AIDS was first diagnosed in 1981, more than 25 million people have died as a result of the virus. Two million people died from AIDS in the year 2007 alone. The average male produces several million new sperm daily. Conversely, a female is born with a finite amount of eggs and will produce no more than that throughout her lifetime. Statistics show that approximately 90% of men and 65% of women masturbate from time to time. Worldwide, 27.5% of women report that they felt pressured into having sex for the first time compared to 15% of men reporting the same feelings. According to a 2007 worldwide sex survey, the average age when people first have sex is 19.25. The survey also found that people in Asian countries tended to lose their virginity at a much later age (an average of 22) than those in Western cultures (an average of 18). The car is second only to the bedroom as a favorite place to have sex Outside of the bedroom, the most common place for adults in the U.S. to have sex is the car. The average couple spends about 20 minutes engaged in sexual foreplay prior to intercourse. Worldwide, sexually active adults report having sex an average of 103 times per year. This number is down from an average of 127 times per year in 2003. One report states that 48% of women have faked an orgasm at least once in their life. Interestingly, an identical 48% of men also report faking an orgasm at least once. Throughout the world, approximately 25% of people report having had only one sexual partner. Conversely, 21% of people report having more than 10 sexual partners in their lifetime. One survey reports that 53% of sexually active Americans claim to have sex at least once weekly. However, only 48% of Americans report being satisfied with their sex life. Many of the ingredients in chocolate are proven to cause arousal similar in effect to sexual foreplay. In fact, some experts believe chocolate may be even more effective than foreplay for sexual arousal. Both men and women can be turned on by the aromas of wine. The scents of many wines are believed to replicate human pheromones, the chemical substances that cause behavioral responses in humans. Endorphins released during sexual activity create a euphoria similar to that produced by opioid drug use. These same endorphins also act as extremely effective pain killers. See An Infograph on SEX

What Our Lips Are Telling Us - Part 3

First (1-6) | Previous (7-12)

Loading...

13. Even a light lip-brushing is a huge turn-on for our brains

“It probably depends on who you ask -- it’s culturally influenced,” the Expert says. The famous Indian sex text the Kama Sutra advises going for the lips, of course, as well as the inside of the mouth, the breasts, the throat and most places on the face. Science also provides some clues: It turns out that a disproportionate amount of brain space is taken up with processing information from the lips compared to the rest of our bodies. “Just a light brush on them stimulates a very large part of the brain -- an area even more expansive than would be activated by sexual stimulation below the belt,” the Expert writes.


14. Men like tongue more than we do

Remember when Sex and the City’s Charlotte got totally grossed out when one of her dates started licking her face? The moment captures a real distinction between how men and women like their kisses. “There’s this huge gender divide: Men tend to express a preference for wet, sloppy, open-mouthed kisses, and women are constantly complaining about too much tongue,” the Expert says. There’s a reason guys do what they do: An open mouth allows men to dose women with small amounts of libido-raising testosterone via their saliva. “If he’s kissing her over weeks or months, it enhances her libido over time,” the Expert says.

15. Kissing while (mildly) intoxicated can up the passion

To drink or not to drink? On the one hand, drugs and alcohol stimulate some of the same brain chemicals as a kiss, so you could mistake your substance-induced high for passionate feelings about your partner, the Expert says. But, that said, if you’re looking for something casual, kissing can be better after a drink or two (and alcohol can release your inhibitions, making a kiss more likely). “It can wind up feeling better or worse -- it depends on how drugs affect your sense of reality,” the Expert says. “Kissing acts as a drug on top of everything else, so when there’s a lot riding on it, go with most accurate impression of what you feel,” which is probably more obvious when you’re sober.


16. Kissing never gets old -- even when we do

While there hasn’t been much study of kissing and longevity, there’s reason to think that kissing is vital -- and enjoyable -- throughout our lives, the Expert says. “Kissing is so important to long-term bonds,” she says. ”It helps to maintain a relationship.” So she suspects kissing plays an important role from birth to death.


17. Kissing can actually help you make up

Forget chocolate and flowers -- just plant one on her lips. Though a woman may profess to be unmoved by a kiss from the man she’s fighting with, research has found that a smooch (or a few) paves the path to forgiveness, the Expert writes. The effect may come from the oxytocin that’s released during kissing. Kissing may reduce levels of cortisol -- the stress hormone -- coursing through our bodies during a fight. “Reducing stress is a pretty good way to amend a fractured relationship,” the Expert says.


18. Men see kisses as a means to an end

No doubt: Both men and women enjoy kissing. But while women tend to ascribe big-picture significance to a kiss (is he "The One"?) guys often smooch for short-term gain. Exhibit A: Prostitutes don’t kiss their johns, and the clients don’t seem to mind. For men, while kissing can be meaningful, it also can be all about sex, the Expert says. “Men are kissing as a means to an end: They’re swapping saliva so they can swap something else later,” she says. “Women look to a kiss to assess relationship status. We are sensitive to things that tweak out compatibility, and from an evolutionary perspective, men don’t need to do that.”

First (1-6) | Previous (7-12)

Related Story: How women like to get first Kiss



CLICK HERE TO FIND MORE INTERESTING STORIES...
  

Tweet     

Loading...

What Our Lips Are Telling Us

1. Is it in his kiss?

Oh, yes. Osculation, the scientific term for kissing, in many ways says everything about your compatibility with your mate and the health of your relationship. What Our Lips Are Telling Us,We asked an expert, to tackle some of your top questions when it comes to smooching. Curious to know what happens inside our brains and bodies when we do it? Wondering whether a kiss means more to you than to your guy, or whether you can make your make-out session even better?



2. Kissing isn’t just about chemistry

While two strangers might serendipitously find themselves chemically compatible, more often the best kisses grow out of an emotional connection and ambience, Expert says. “So much of a great kiss is understanding the needs and desires of another person -- there’s no one-size-fits-all formula to it,” she says. How-to guides “focus on where to put your hand or how to set the mood, when so much of it is intuitive that you make the person comfortable, secure and safe. It’s an ultimate expression of how you feel about them.”


3. Kissing is universal

Kissing seems “almost completely universal” among humans today, the Expert says. But it wasn’t always so; she cites the work of anthropologist Helen Fisher, who’s noted that certain South African tribes once “found kissing disgusting” and that it was previously “unknown” among people in parts of East Africa and South America. Still, non-kissing cultures did kissy things like lick, suck or blow on a lover’s face before intercourse, the Expert writes. “Now kissing is exported and we’re using mouthwash and toothpaste, so in some ways the experience is so much better than before it became a common custom,” she says.

4. We always remember our first kiss

If you’re like most people, you remember your first kiss much better than losing your virginity, according to Butler University research. It’s not clear why, but the Expert says it may relate to a kiss being our introduction to sexual behavior -- and to all the important decisions that come with it. “I would expect it has to do with novelty and how much we engage all our senses in the behavior,” she says. “A kiss really works as nature’s litmus test. It tells us whether we decide to pursue a relationship.”



5. Kissing comes naturally but our techniques can evolve

We’re kissed from birth (more on that later) and other social animals seem to kiss, too. Bonobos -- a type of Chimpanzee -- have been known to smooch for up to 12 minutes straight, while giraffes like to entwine necks, and even fish touch lips, the Expert says. So while all of us seem to be programmed to know what to do, we pick up culture-specific techniques from movies and TV. Still, the Expert says, “There are definitely things people can learn to make it a better experience.” Lay off the pressure -- it produces the stress hormone cortisol, a real buzz kill. “Getting to know someone fosters a bond and makes the likelihood of a kiss going well higher,” she says.



6. It’s all about first impressions

A bad first kiss can kill a would-be romance faster than you can reapply your lipstick. In a S.U.N.Y. Albany survey, 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women reported ending a relationship because the first kiss was off. The finding points to the way we unconsciously assess reproductive compatibility through a kiss, so a good kiss may signal a sizzling future under the sheets, the Expert says. Kissing releases chemicals associated with romantic and emotional bonding (oxytocin) and pleasure (dopamine). “A lot of people, especially men, judge how someone might perform later based on kissing,” she says. “If you have that boost in oxytocin, those dopamine spikes, you can’t wait to be with that person.”




Next (7-12)


Related Story:Types of Kisses

Benefits of Neem - Azadirachta indica

Neem, scientifically referred to as Azadirachta indica, is a medicinal tree. It offers plenty of usages in several shapes and sizes. It has anti-fungal, anti-bacterial, anti-viral, anti-diabetic, and anti-infertility properties. All parts of Neem including seeds, leaves, flowers and bark have medicinal properties. It is native to Indian continent.

Typically, it is known as the ¡¥village pharmacy¡¦ because of its holistic power to protect against several health complications. Let us explore some more details about it. Since ancient ages, this tree is well-respected the history of natural medicine. It can treat various diseases and disorders ranging from malaria to bad teeth. Almost all parts of this tree contain medicinal benefits. Its seeds, leaves and barks have compounds known as limonoids with proven medicinal properties.

Ecology

Neem is drought resistance. It can tolerate almost any length of high temperature. Typically this tree is grown in sub-arid to sub-humid areas, where the annual rainfall varies between 400mm to 1200mm. This tree thrives in any types of soil, however, best grown in well drained deep sandy soil. This tree cannot stay alive below 4„aC temperatures. At this temperature, leaf shedding is confirmed in addition to premature death.

Neem tree has various usages in a variety of sectors. Let us focus exploring some of them.

Medicinal Usages

The twig of this tree is largely used as a tooth brush in different regions of India, Pakistan and Bangladesh. It is an oldest tradition used effectively in dental care. The oil extracted from the seeds and kernel of the Neem tree is used in the manufacturing of cosmetics such as soaps, shampoos, balms, and creams. It has the potentiality to use as a great carbon dioxide sink. Traditionally it has been recognized as a great resource for anti-desertification property. It offers great solution to acne and provides good support for skin elasticity. Ayurveda and traditional herbal medicine suggest chicken pox patients to sleep on neem leaves to get rid off the problem. The neem gum prepared from bark is typically used as a bulking agent and for the production of medicinal foods for diabetic patients.

Horticulture Usages

This tree offers a great resource for environment-friendly biopesticides. Limonoids found in the leaves, seeds and bark are used as an effective insect-growth controlling substance. The uniqueness lies with its ability to alter the life-processing behavior of the insect in such a fashion that the insect becomes unable to feed, breed or undergo through metamorphosis process. 

Disease Control and Pest Control

The extract of leaves, seeds as well as barks is effective in treating scabies, a transmissible ectoparasite skin infection. It is a great substitute for permethrin. Scabies is not at all resistant to the biochemical properties of neem, so in prolonged complication of scabies neem is found to be effective. Human head lice can be cured with the external application of neem leave juice over the scalp. In Ayurveda, it is respected as ¡¥Sarbaroganibarini¡¦, which means ¡¥cure for all diseases¡¦.

According to the report produced by The National Institute of Health, its extract has the potentiality to be used as an AIDS preventive. However, not sufficient researches have been conducted so far.

It has anti-allergic properties. So it is able to inhibit allergic reactions if applied either externally or internally. Possibly in recent decades, it can be used as an effective male birth control pill. This is the for the first time in human history the production of men birth pill without affecting libido or sperm production has become possible within the span of controlled study.

It has the ability to enhance the immune system. Also its immune polysaccharides property makes it a future cancer cure. Apart from that, it decreases the blood sugar level and reduces the possible usage of insulin to 30%-50%, hence it is effective for diabetic patient. The extracts are found to be beneficial for other diseases as well such as herpes, heart diseases, hepatitis, fungal infection, malaria, psoriasis, and ulcer.

CLICK HERE TO FIND MORE INTERESTING STORIES...

Tweet

How to keep your cool

Once there lived an old man who kept all different kinds of animals. But his grandson was particularly intrigued by two tigers that lived together in one cage. The tigers had different temperaments; one was calm and self-controlled whilst the other was unpredictable, aggressive, violent, and vicious.

“Do they ever fight, Grandfather?” asked the young boy.

“Occasionally, yes they do,” admitted the old man.

“And which one wins?”

“Well, that depends on which one I feed the most.”

Being able to control your emotions depends in part on how much you ‘feed’  a particular emotion; on how much we focus on what we are afraid of, enraged by,  or depressed about. But it’s more than that. Good ‘emotional intelligence’ requires we understand our own moods, recognizing when and why we are upset and having very real strategies in place to be able to influence the way that we feel.

So if you ever find yourself tossed around helplessly on a hysterical tumultuous sea of emotion and want some ways to at least adjust your sails, the better to steer your own course toward calmer waters, then read on, dear friend.

Tip 1: Control your emotions by looking ahead

I recall an old Zen master saying: “Your anger, depression, spite, or despair, so seemingly real and important right now; where will they have gone in a month, a week, or even a moment?”

Very intense emotions blind us to the future (1) and con us that now is all that matters. In fact, when we are incredibly angry or anxious, we can even momentarily forget that there is even going to be a future. I’m reminded of one guy I worked with who’d stuffed an ice cream cone in his boss’s face when he was enraged. This momentary action had huge and prolonged consequences on this man’s life; particularly finances.

We’ve all said or done things we later regret simply because, for a time, we let ourselves be dictated by our own emotion. If you get angry, think to yourself: “How will I feel tomorrow if I lose my dignity and tell this person (I have to see everyday) that they have a face like a cow pat?” If you are anxious about some imminent event, say to yourself: “Wow, how am I going to feel tomorrow/next week when I look back at this?” Look beyond the immediate and you’ll see the bigger picture and calm down, too.

Tip 2: Get to know yourself

We all kid ourselves a little/a lot. “No, I’m really pleased for you! No,  I really am!” (Arghhhhhhhh!)

Learn to observe your own attitudes and emotional ebbs and flows. One key first step to emotional control is to know when we are actually being emotional and also why.

If you catch yourself feeling unexpectedly strongly about something, ask yourself why. Controlling your emotions isn’t about pretending they are not there. If you feel jealous, angry, sad, bitter, or greedy, label exactly how you are feeling in your own mind: “Okay, I don’t like that I’m feeling this way,  but I’m feeling very envious!” Now you’ve admitted it to yourself.

The next step is to identify why you feel the way you do: “I hate to admit it, but I’m feeling envious of Bob because he’s just been complimented for his work and I haven’t!”

Being able to exercise this self-honesty means you don’t have to resort to what a large proportion of the human race do. You won’t have to ‘rationalize’.  We rationalize by kidding ourselves that we are angry with someone not because they have got a raise at work and we haven’t, but because of ‘their attitude towards us’ or some other made up reason. Knowing what emotion you are feeling and being man or woman enough to identify the truth as to why you are feeling it means you’re that much closer to doing something about it.

Tip 3: Change your mood; do something different

We tend to assume that moods just ‘happen to us’ and, like storms, the best we can do is wait until they pass. But, unlike climatic storms, we can influence - even change - our moods without resorting to unhealthy means such as alcohol or drugs. Being able to manage and influence your own emotions is a powerful marker for good health,  emotional maturity, and happiness.

One way to alter your mood is to instantly do something else. For example, if you feel flat and bored, continuing to watch uninteresting TV will deepen the mood. Switching it off and going for a walk in a new neighbourhood will inevitably change your mood. If you feel cross, consciously focus on three things in your life for which you can feel grateful. If you are anxious, start to imagine that what you are anxious about has already happened and gone much better than expected.

The important thing is just to do or think something different. Don’t be passively carried along by the current of the mood. The quickest way to do this may be to simply imagine not feeling the way you are feeling. So if I’m feeling hacked off, I might close my eyes and take a few moments to strongly imagine feeling relaxed and comfortable and even in a good mood. This will, at the very least, neutralize the bad mood and may even put you in a good mood.

Tip 4: Observe how others deal effectively with their emotions

We can learn so much from other people (as long as we look to the right people to learn from!).

How do other ‘emotionally skilled’ people deal with their frustrations and difficulties? You could even ask them: “How do you keep so cool when you’re presenting to all these people? Why doesn’t that make you angry? How do you keep smiling after such setbacks?"

Their answers could actually change your life if you start to apply what you learn.

Tip 5: Change your physiology

Some people assume that emotions are ‘all in your head’, whereas actually all emotions are physical responses.  Anger pushes heart rate and blood pressure up, which is why having an angry temperament is a predictor of heart disease (2); anxiety produces lots of physical changes; and even depression suppresses the immune system (3).

So part of changing your emotional state involves dealing directly with the physical changes. Physical changes are led by the way we breathe. For instance, anger and anxiety can only ‘work’ if we are breathing quicker with shallow breaths. Take time to:

 
• Stop breathing for five seconds (to ‘reset’ your breath).
 
• Now breathe in slowly, focussing on your diaphragm, until your lungs are full of air.
 
• Then breathe out even more slowly (and whilst doing this, imagine that you are breathing pure rest and relaxation into your hands).
 
• Keep doing this and remember it’s the out-breath that will calm everything down.

Tip 6: Use your noggin

Think of emotion as a strong but stupid being that sometimes needs your guidance and direction. We need some emotion to motivate us, but it needs to be the right emotion at the right time applied in the right way. The more emotional we become, the stupider we become (4). This is because emotions want us to react blindly and physically rather than to think or be objective and rational.

Being objective and rational when a lion was attacking wouldn’t have been great from an evolutionary point of view - because it would have slowed us down. But much of modern life needs measured calm thought rather than blind and sloppy emotional responses.

If you force the thinking part of your brain to work when you start to feel emotional, then you can dilute and subdue the rampaging emotional part.  You can do this by simply forcing yourself to remember three names of other students you went to school with or even running through the alphabet in your head. Try it - because it really will work.

Tip 7: Create spare capacity in your life

We experience counterproductive emotions for different reasons. Maybe we have never learnt to control ourselves or perhaps we are living in such a way that makes it more likely we’ll experience emotional problems.

Every organism, from amoeba to antelope and from bluebell flower to blue whale, has needs. And so do you. If these needs aren’t met, then the organism will suffer. You have very basic needs for food, sleep, shelter, and water; if these needs aren’t met properly, you will feel more emotional - no doubt. But you also have emotional needs.

To be emotionally healthy, a person needs to:

 
• Feel safe and secure; feel they have safe territory.
 
• Regularly give and receive quality attention.
 
• Feel a sense of influence and control over their life.
 
• Feel part of a wider community.
 
• Enjoy friendship, fun, love, and intimacy with significant people.
 
• Feel a sense of status; basically, feel they have a recognizable role in life. This also connects to a sense of competence and achievement.
 
• Feel stretched but not stressed to avoid stagnation, boredom, and to enhance self-esteem and a sense of status in life.

When these are met adequately, we then feel our life has meaning and purpose.
  Not meeting basic needs leaves us feeling that life is pointless and meaningless and will leave us wide open to emotional problems.

When you live in a way that, to some extent, meets all or most of the above needs, then you’ll enjoy greater emotional stability and control. Knowing what you need in life is the first step to creating ‘spare capacity’ to focus beyond your emotions. And you can see how not meeting the need for feeling secure or getting enough attention or feeling connected to people around you could cause you emotional problems. Really think about these needs and gradually pursue activities that are likely to help you fulfil them.

In this way, you’ll begin to feed the right tiger with the right amount of the right foods.

 
1. Delaying gratification and looking beyond immediate greed (and yes, greed is an emotion) seems to be an indicator of lifelong success and even better mental health. The marshmallow experiment is a well-known test of this concept conducted by Walter Mischel at Stanford University and discussed by Goleman in his popular work, Emotional Intelligence.  In the 1960s, a group of four-year-olds were given a marshmallow and promised another, only if they could wait 20 minutes before eating the first one. Some children could wait and others could not. The researchers then followed the progress of each child into adolescence and demonstrated that those with the ability to wait were better adjusted and more dependable (determined via surveys of their parents and teachers), and scored an average of 210 points higher on the Scholastic Aptitude Test.
 
2. Ironson, G. (1992) Effects of anger on left ventricular ejection fraction in coronary heart disease, American Journal of Cardiology, 70.
 
3. David Spiegal, MD and Sam Wilson, professor and associate chair of psychiatry and behavioural sciences, found that women with breast cancer and depression are at higher risk of cancer recurrence and early death than breast cancer patients without depression. The research suggested this was because of the way depression suppresses the immune system, making it harder to fight off disease. The research findings were published in the journal Brain, Behavior, and Immunity.
 
4. Strong emotion stops us thinking clearly. See Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking bookEmotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ, published in 1995.

CLICK HERE TO FIND MORE INTERESTING STORIES...

Tweet